This represents how my self esteem is divided up right now. That is 2/3 appearance based judgements.

This is where I would love to be in 6 months time. I want more things to matter in life. I want to judge how I feel about myself more on who I am as a person, what I enjoy and what affect I have on the world around me, not solely on face value. I don’t judge other people by their appearances so I shouldn’t judge myself by mine. On this appearance in general still features as weight will always matter to me but I want to take more care of my skin and make up and clothes and let them define me more than the body that resides beneath.

• changes to my hair, skin and nails
  

• fatigue, lethargy
  
• headaches
  
• electrolyte imbalance
  
• parasthesias (tingling/numbness feelings)
  
• heart irregularities
  
• delayed stomach emptying
  
• bloating, gas and stomach pain
  
• reflux
  
• dehydration
  
• muscle cramps

Psychological complications:

• depression
• social anxiety
• worrying
• obsessive compulsive symptoms
• mood swings
• difficulties with judgment and decision making
• social isolation
• decreased self-esteem
• self-harm behaviours

From within with heart and soul

I am Emma, I have had anorexia since I was 13 years old and now at nearly 18 I am finally fighting for recovery for real.

As well as intensive outpatient therapy I am working my way through a challenging recovery work book and my aim of blog is to post my answers to the book so I can keep a record of how I feel and who I am, so when I am futher along in my recovery I can look back as see how far I have come. This blog is about recovery, it isn’t going to be a straight line or easy but hopefully it will end in recovery!